Didn't go to CrossFit today. I am very disappointed in myself. I let myself be overcome by stress as I lay abed this morning and instead of fighting through it, I suffered quietly alone. I had to text Coworker M and Coworker K to give me pep talks just to make it into the office today.
There's something so daunting about seeing your to-do list and knowing that you're not going to make it. How do you keep from letting yourself down when you know the only way the day will end is with disappointment and panic?
Plugging away today, trying to accomplish things and pick up slack since last night I didn't finish everything I was supposed to do YESTERDAY either. I managed to get new car insurance and plan out how to pay my tuition next month, so that's a plus. Also surreptitiously working on an infographic for a school project in between mold and bacteria samples at the lab. Multitasking for the win?
Tonight after I force myself to work (dang it) until everything is done, I'm rewarding myself with a sleepless night (wait, what?) and going to see a friend play on a hockey beer league at 11:30 PM. Perhaps I'll manage a bit of sleep before CrossFit tomorrow. Either way, I have to pay my dues for December, because you know what? I'm not giving up.
Today's Reason: because at dinner last night, my friend reminded me that I've got a long way to go, and that the only way to get there is by fighting for it... otherwise I won't respect myself. If I can't respect myself, why would anyone else respect me?
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