A New Dawn

Hey there, it's been a while. 

I feel like apologies and explanations are in order for my extended absence. Perhaps Hyperbole and a Half can explain it better than I can though:

Depression Part One

Depression Part Two



That's how it is sometimes. You hate yourself to the point where nothing and everything is possible and you hate yourself more for hating yourself. Going to the gym seems like something you know you should do and will make you feel better, but you don't go... and then you use that fact to abuse yourself some more. It's just a big stupid downward spiral.

I've been nursing my wounds for the past month or two. The injuries I incurred in April have healed, but I've been tenderly insulating my emotional hurts with cookies and champagne.

So much for that New Year's Resolution about drinking! So much for respecting my body enough to put healthy foods into it!  Pretty much the only investment I made into good food in the past few months was purchasing an assortment of grass fed hormone free meat from John Henry's. 

Other than that, I've not been to CrossFit, nor have I been particularly active. I've been feeling low and sick and exhausted and generally full of the ailments of depression and I can practically feel my  muscles deteriorating into goo as I write this. 

Ennui to Energy V 2.0

I feel supremely guilty over the separation from my CrossFit family. I didn't even tell them I was leaving, I just faded away. I received a short note from Coach J, hoping I was doing alright and it wasn't even the standard form letter that they send when you miss a week of class. I miss them and hope that I can find the ability to go back.

This weekend my roommate and I are going to head down to Columbus for the Regional CrossFit competition. I think the inspiration will help. It can't possibly hurt!!

On the upside, I've been feeling better. The desire to do things is starting to creep back into my life. I'm getting enthusiastic about certain subjects and beginning to dream new adventures to have. So far those good feelings haven't been enough to get me off the couch, but it's a start!



So let's start again.